He Got a Deer

This shall be a long post, dedicated to filling you guys in on my life as of late... I know you missed me!

Fans, my husband shot a deer yesterday. Did he take it to a deer processor? No fans, he did not... he did it... himself... in a field...

I was kind of impressed... and relieved. When a catastrophic event occurs and we are forced to live off the land, not only will I have seven years of water from my mom and five years of eyeshadow that I've collected (some people's priorities are different... it doesn't make them shallow), but my husband can butcher his own kill! Which will unfortunately be the rabid squirrel/raccoon/armadillo combination of Cahaba Heights... ew... I can picture it now... "Come over friends and family for my special VERMIN STEW." At least I'll look good...

Now, I am awake and poring over recipes for "non-gamey tasting venison." I turned to my beloved Pioneer Woman... but she's worthless. Endless recipes for beef. My fave. Sadly, we do not have beef... we have deer. And a LOT of it. Just piled in my fridge. It's gross... I don't like it... but Darling Husband MURDERED it, so I have to figure out something to do with it.

Before, when forced with the task of finding ways to prepare an innocent kill, I've turned to allrecipes.com. After one terrible country tasting disaster (I think it suggested serving biscuits with it), I decided to go the Epicurious/Bon Appetit route... we'll see how it goes... they suggest marinading venison for at least 12 hours, so at least it's too late to tackle this project today!

Now, because I've made a rude comment about biscuits, I think I owe you guys an explanation. I DO NOT LIKE BISCUITS. I hate the WORD biscuit. BISSSKIT. I wish the little carb/calorie dense puffs did not bring about so much hatred in my heart... but they do. Kind of like crescent rolls. YUCK YUCK YUCK. When A or L say that they are on their way to Chick-fil-A for a BISSSKIT, I don't like them for a moment. Anger management issues? Perhaps. But I have three main reasons I do not like biscuits:
1. The way the word sounds- like a hissing SNAKE...I have already addressed this, so we'll move on...
2. They are made with shortening. Shortening reminds me of fondant. Fondant makes me cry/yell/send chills down my spine. Plus, it looks weird. It is really white and creepy and greasy OMG I HATE SHORTENING...
3. They stick to the roof of your mouth. ICK.

Carbs I LOVE- PASTA, toast, all breads besides biscuits (such as one whole baguette, just for me), potatoes sometimes, sweet potatoes, wine, juices, fruits, cookies, cakes, pies, bar cookies, those delish hazelnut chocolate things with the gold wrapper that they put at the checkout knowing that fewls like myself cannot resist... plus lots of other things. I'm not a freak/weirdo after all. Just kidding. I totally am.

Stay tuned next week for my VERY FAVORITE WEEK OF THE WHOLE FREAKING ENTIRE YEAR...

Want a sneak peak because you know I will never write about it? Okay, I will indulge you!!!! I mean this week has possibilities beyond all other weeks of the entire YEAR!

Today- stay in/clean/watch movies with Darling Husband/put my new orange rug in my kitchen/iron/grocery shop.

Monday-Wednesday- get up early, work, come home. Why only M-W, you wonder? BECAUSE DA BOSS is having our CHRISTMAS PARTY on THURSDAY NIGHT! We are having our office Christmas party on Thursday night, which means we will leave work around lunch on Thursday and have the whole day Friday to do whatever we want!

Tuesday or Wednesday- Little Bubby is coming home from Auburn for Christmas! We will do things like eat falafel, fight, go shopping, and he will do all of our home related projects that we are too dumb to do!

One other random night or Sunday- bake with A/GOSSIP/sing carols! A is as free with her unique voice as I am with mine. Duets are especially fun. We may or may not do them multiple times... This is so much better than singing with E... she would, on occasion, upstage Mariah. Not fair at all...

Friday- get up EARLY/go to mom's/drink about six thousand cups of coffee/bake ALL day/hold my big fat kitty man/cuddle with the dog! Not much else to say- this is just a fun, fun day!

Saturday- shop ALL day until we poop out with L. Why do I love shopping with L for an entire day instead of splitting it up? Because neither of us mind going from the Galleria to the Summit, back to the Galleria, to T.J.'s on 31 back to T.J.'s on 280. No one else will do this with me. We like to settle in with some nuggets or hot chocolate and enjoy the hour it takes to park!

I think there are a couple of parties stuck in there too... but I'll survive them. In flats.

MERRY CHRISTMAS FANS!!!!
-UB