Hi Fans! And MEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRY Christmas! I know people like posts with pics, so I put a few at the beginning to lure you guys in... anyway...
Two parties down, PLEASE GOD only one more to go!
Now let me begin by saying that my office Christmas party would not have been so painful if I had not been the unfortunate victim of an explosion. That's right, fans... UB was the victim of a true explosion of bread pudding sauce. BOILING, ON FIRE whiskey butter sauce everywhere... but even that was not so bad. You think I am not used to a few minor kitchen burns? Oh I am... kind of like L... when she burned her arm in home ec in high school baking cookies or something... then had to have her arm bandaged... then the rest of our really huge high school assumed she had tried to slit her wrist. That was very, very, VERY bad. Or the time I got braces and a friend made fun of the fact I was missing two teeth in the front and looked terrible and then I pulled her hair until she cried and fell to the floor. Actually, when I think about it, that's nothing like this... but it was scarring nonetheless.
Back to my story... after the sauce exploded everywhere, I did what I typically do when something embarrassing happens... I froze. Then, the nurse of the party came over to make sure I was free of third degree burns. Of course I was. THEN, later, someone happened to point out in front of the majority of my coworkers and their spouses that I had a burn on my face. I then had to explain (in front of the majority of my coworkers and their spouses) that there was no need to fear... it was a ZIT. Thanks Accutane. Thanks a lot. I believe I would have moved past this by now if someone had not earlier pointed out the fact that they were worried about me because I simply looked SO tired. Don't you love hearing that?!? Nothing makes you feel better than "Oh sweetheart, you look TIRED! What's going on? Are you sleeping? Are you having trouble with the hubby? You can be honest with me."
Skip ahead... I bake hundreds of cookies with my mom the next day...what a great time we were having... then... it is almost time to leave when I realize I never used the brown sugar. I said "Mom, looks like you bought a ton of brown sugar we didn't need." She reminded me that two cups of brown sugar were supposed to go into one of the cookie recipes. Of COURSE they were. Color me furious! Those freaking cookies took forever. And I left out the sugar. What a fool I am!!!
So the husband and I head out to the next party. One of his colleagues brings a date who just happens to have a boyfriend. Not weird at all for the rest of us!!! One guy thought it would be fun to mess with them... "Hey there buddy! Is this the girl you've been talking about CONSTANTLY?" It WOULD have been funny... except it was terrible. For everyone. The girl freaked, everyone stood silent... well... everyone except for me. I laughed. Because the awkwardness was so fabulous I just could NOT help myself! HAHAHA! "She just doesn't know anyone! I'm trying to help her meet people... it's not a date..." HAHA! HAHA! Watching people who deserve to be uncomfortable BE uncomfortable is one of my top ten favorite things to do.
What are some of my other favorite things to do, you ask?
Eating salty cured meats, watching t.v. shows, talking with a British accent, and playing with baby animals... among many other things...
I must attend to my household duties today. So much to do, so little time.
HASTA LA VISTA fans!
XOXO,
Undercover Blogger
