I am still on my quest to get an iphone. It's an annoying quest. I tried going to the At&t store the other day and talking to this guy from high school. He pretended not to remember me, but I know he did. I mean...come on...LOOK AT ME! And in high school I was tanner and cuter. Now I'm being ravaged by age. Wrinkles are forming, fans.
Anyway, that brings me to my post- the 10% tax in this health care law for tanning. I don't think this is right. If we tax tanning beds, why shouldn't we just tax God for creating the sun? I could just as easily bake in the sun all day with baby oil. Or we could tax people for using hair dye- they say the dark colors cause cancer. Or grills- charred meat has carcinogens. Liquid smoke that you add to your foods too. Next, someone will suggest we get a tax credit for eating pomegranates and blueberries. And dark chocolate, but not milk chocolate because the health benefits of dark chocolate are good/milk chocolate bad. I would throw them for a loop and introduce a swirly combo of milk and dark chocolate. Would that even it out and be tax neutral under this supposed plan I've created? This does get very complicated and involved, so perhaps we would create more jobs. People who analyze every product on the market (I'm stating these things mostly to annoy sweet JH)...
On to my next point... WHY IS AT&T SO STUPID? THEY ARE. I want to upgrade my service to a more expensive phone with a more expensive plan, yet they refuse to let me. WHY? I'm already the last person on EARTH to have a cool phone. Why must I suffer like this?
My life is full of suffering, fans.
First, I can't get an iphone. Second, I have a breakout around my mouth. What if people think I have mouth herpes?
LIFE IS UNFAIR, yet again. At least I found really cute shoes in my size (never happens) at Macy's this weekend. SEXXIII.
XOXO-
UB
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Who am I? That's one secret I'll never tell...
